i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I wish i was in the wii world.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Randomize
