I molested 6 butterflies tonight
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
