it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Randomize