ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
