I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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