Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
