I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
