I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
operation harelip BJ is a go
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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