Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
