so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
