Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
