I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize