Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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