Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
God, you're like boner-b-gone
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
