I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize