I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
