Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
