69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
