She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize
