...so i touched it.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
