Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
