If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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