Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
