just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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