So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I just blew my weed a kiss
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
