Rock
Scissors
Fuck
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
This is classic penis vs brain.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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