If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I supernannyed him into submission
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize