I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize