There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Randomize
