Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
He? As in you personified your dick?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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