We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Watching her eat just hurts me
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
