We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
