The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I have aggressive nipples.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
