Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
