On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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