imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
