Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
