Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
