Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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