I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
