I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I could make wine with my vomit
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
