She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Randomize