he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
