I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
