Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
