dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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