just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
So vagazzling was a success
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
