im gay
i know
yea but for you.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
