hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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