Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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