oh god the rape fog is back!
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
