i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
