I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
