I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
