I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
